New Word Hits Dictionary!!

Scientists struggled to come up with a name for the observed geological phenomenon of lava meeting the ocean.

After holding a contest in which the winner gets a 5 lb bag of lava rocks and a certificate, they struggled to narrow it down to these top 10 submissions:

1.  LICE  (Top Contender) --as in Lava plus icy ocean --
or LICEY  -sounds cute and has cartoon animation potential
2.  Burn in Hello
3. MoltenWave
4. Mr. HotCold
5. Trump's Anus
6. Firewater
6. Brimstone
6. Hellfire
7. WetBlanket
8. FireSurf
9. LavaSpa
10. Killwave

The committee had to be unanimous and were a vote away from making Phil Trapp III the winner with his "Lice" contest entry. 

The holdout convinced them that too much explanation was required and they didn't want anyone confusing the  U.S. National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration with the CDC.

So, they finally chose a winner. The official name for lava meeting ocean is???

JEROME!!!!

It was named after the wonderful man who brought them coffee and moist towelettes until 3am.

Congrats Jerome! You are now a force of nature!!

They even gave him a $25 gift card to Ace Hardware in lieu of the lava rocks he declined. 

The fame from his win gave him the courage to run for Janitor of the Year!!!

Vote for Jerome!!

(text "moist towelette" to 89779")

Rare Photos Taken on Surface of Pur Polaria

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                             

 "The
Purple Planet" (Pur Polaria) is an Earth-like planet believed to be capable of supporting life. Pur Polaria got its' name from the purple bacteria (photosynthetic microorganism to be exact) on its' surface, observed from space by  astrophysicists.

In the early stages of discovery, it was believed Pur Polaria was merely filled with distinctive spectroscopic forests of fungi. In spite of its' beautiful color, little interest was generated in this particular Exoplanet.

 It was originally recorded that the planet aimlessly orbited rocky, bland colored stars. But interest spiked and popular myths abounded after Dr. Ian O'Neill wrote an article entitled: 

The First Aliens We Discover May Be Purple

Intense investigations focused on the purple planet in hopes of finding either one-eyed, one-horned, or flying purple people eaters. Did Pur Polaria have the needed  Earth-like dimensions? Did it  orbit a sun-like rocky yet bland colored star? Apparently yes, but their sun appeared to be dying as evidenced by this astonishing photo:

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Among the violet microbial mats between the Archean Earths, amateur and professional astronomers alike were able to identify entire  tribes of man-beasts! (Photo below:)

 With the use of radiative transfer modalities, they captured this shocking photo of a planet that has clearly become a combat zone. They estimate Pur Polaria has been plagued by endless internal war  for over 100 years. ( The photo belows shows evidence of mass graves and high tech weaponry damage to the planet's crust):

 There is much debate over this next rare photo. Many well-respected astrophysicists believe this is an encrypted message from the man-beasts. Is it a call for help? request for directions? is it literal? figurative? :

More will be known when cryptologic linguists investigate further. Scientists are also questioning if  Prince might be a PurPolarian messenger of some kind.