Beware the Time Loop

UFO caught on tape 

EVIDENCE OF ALIENS !!!!

video below may be removed soon

by the powers that be

Diagram of Time Loop Phenomenon

If you find yourself stuck in a time loop, draw on your years of watching Quantum Leap and good luck!!!
If you find yourself stuck in a time loop, draw on your years of watching Quantum Leap and good luck!!!
If you find yourself stuck in a time loop, draw on your years of watching Quantum Leap and good luck!!!
If you find yourself stuck in a time loop, draw on your years of watching Quantum Leap and good luck!!!

If you find yourself stuck in a time loop, draw on your years of watching Quantum Leap and good luck!!!

Time Lapse on Aslipsee Train

 Commuters on the  Aslipsee Metro RegLine SB, reported leaving the station at 8am and arriving downtown the previous day.

 Police feared rioting when the commuters realized it was in fact SUNDAY and they were not scheduled to work.  

Tension was eased when a 4 star Pop-up Restaurant arrived and served food cooked hot off the rails. 

 Officials are looking into the possibility that solar flare ponies  may have punctured the space-time continuum at Rothjab.

While the incident is under investigation, officials DID issue this statement: "The train conductor is highly qualified, but he transferred to us from the MEI (Mars/Earth Interface) U-Portal System. He is used to driving conditions in Mars where it is dry, hot, and sunny all the time.  He failed to make proper adjustments to account for the rain and electrical storm.

 A combination of increased voltage, highly-ionized air, and miscalculation, made the train veer left into the wall of light.

Is it a coincidence that  The Bajak Time Travel Flux Capacitor operates on 44 Volts, and the time bending train was reported as operating on 4,444 Volts? The conspiracy theorists don't think so.

 After a comprehensive safety check, investigators  located  pockets of high radioactivity in the quiet cars. They do not believe it was in anyway related to the time lapse incident. It is a well documented fact that quiet car passengers tend to be  'electric' humans. They are introverts who generate large amounts of energy due to internalizing stress and sexual tension.  

Commuters are  being put up in the luxurious Drake Hotel, even though it does not exist in tomorrow.

Trains will resume their normal schedule once time catches up.

Spooks Psychic Cafe Busted for Hiring Illegal Aliens!!

Spooks Psychic Cafe, in Havant, Hampshire, is embroiled in scandal once again.  

 

Spooks' owner, known only as Z, first made the news when the grammar police (the retired English teachers at the yarn shop) complained that their sign promoted bad grammar and reflected badly on the neighborhood.  

 

Lovely Cotton Brain created by the Havant Competitive Knitters Association

 

 

 

The elderly women at "The Knitpik" demanded the sign be written correctly for fear the spookers were promoting illiteracy. (I personally find it a bit hypocritical, given the misspelling of Knitpik, but that's neither here nor scare.) 

Z told reporters, "I will NOT be bullied into using an apostrophe. They indicate possessiveness, and we do not get involved in possession of any kind."   

 

 

But what DO they get involved in at this unusual cafe? 

 

https://sites.google.com/site/witchumum/home

 

Here is what their menu says:

 

  MENU

We first opened for business in XXXX and have been serving Havant ever since.

We offer many kinds of food, such as X, and larger dishes such as Y.

Why not stop by and give them a try?

The matter with the knitpikers resolved brilliantly once they tasted Spooks incredible HL Tea. They passed on the tarot and decided it was best not to inquire about the ingredients of HL Tea.  

Yet, Spooks faces a new problem. Z is being investigated for allegedly hiring illegal aliens. It is rumored, her very psychic workers, are undocumented greys who slipped through the BardoLand Border.  

Many visitors to the cafe were shocked to hear this as they couldn't believe they served food!

 

 It is rumored that this one-time patron met with untold misfortune after giving this 1 star review:

 

What Charlie didn't realize apparently, was that had he gone through the black velvet curtains in the back of the cafe marked "Our Food is to Die For!!," he would have been served a heaping helping of X or Y by Z!   

Only psychic people and/or victims of government mind control  are able to find the velvet curtain for some reason.  Others get scammed out of their pounds and have implants put in their heads without their knowledge.  

 

 

 The cafe has been accused of exploiting the grey aliens with long hours and low pay. Z provided evidence showing that she does NOT in fact PAY the big-eyed busboys,waitstaff, cooks, and surgical techs. 

 

 The illegals work on a volunteer basis in exchange for human implantation privileges.  Long hours are also not a problem as they require no sleep. 

 

   It appears that Spooks Psychic Cafe will once again dodge a bullet. Business has been better than ever since they introduced their Tea, Tarot, Time Travel, and Tamale special.