Tuesday, May 23, 2017
Saturday, May 20, 2017
World's Smartest Cat Discovered
"Brainy McBrainerstein" has set the World's Record for the cat with the highest IQ.
His proud owners attribute it to playing classical music while he was in utero, playing Baby Cat Einstein on a loop, and a pure vegan diet.
Brainy is able to solve complicated problems and fill in the bubbles by dipping his tail in #2 ink, like his ancient ancestors.
The IQ test was minimally adapted:
"You are being chased by a dog running 5 miles an hour.
You need to stop and lick your butt. How long will it take the dog to eat you?"
"Write an essay on something that makes you purr."
Brainy does his owners' taxes, predicts weather, trades stocks and bonds, writes cursive, calligraphy, and can pinpoint the catnip in 100 mile radius.
He calculates everything based on complex algorithms he developed with
Zuckerberg's cat.
On a side note, "Little Fuckerberg" had a facebook page that was reported (by an anonymouse source) and taken down for not having a verifiable name.
B McB predicts human beings will be extinct by the year 3000, by which he will have achieved immortality 9 times over.
Brainy McBrainerstein in action!!!
He will be going live on instagram every Monday from 2 -3 feline time, and taking questions!!
Monday, May 8, 2017
Get Mom a Gift she Will LOVE
Wondering what to give Mom for Mother's Day?
This depression area photo has been made into a glorious 1000 piece puzzle.
Puzzles of depressed people are really big right now.
What better way to make Mom feel good about her life,
than seeing someone else who had it worse?
In her leisure time, Mom can painstakingly put together this picture of a migrant woman who worked herself to the bone.
Set up the card table for her, and Mom might not regret having you, if only for a moment.
Stay tuned for info on the NEXT big thing in time wasters-- murderabilia puzzles!
Starbucks Newest Offering!
Riding on the success of the (stolen idea) Unicorn Frappaccino, Starbucks will be offering a TRUE original--- the
Trump Latte!
Ingredients include: liberal tears, artificial ingredients, orange sprinkles on top, and a spoon to gag yourself with.
Limited time only!
Creative landscaping Catches On
An entire community is decorating their yard with these hand chairs in Hairy Palm Springs, CA.
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